2nd First Day

The synchronized push-back of chairs reminds me of nails on a chalkboard. The decision’s been made, the paperwork signed, so the adults clear their throats, straighten their ties, and smooth their skirts.

My daughter’s legs dangle from her swivel seat as she sways, finishing the final strokes of the mane of a unicorn with a pink crayon. She’s humming, and nervously chewing on her own wavy strands. I push her hair back from her face, but she is intent on finishing.

“Hold on, almost got it.” This is what she’s been saying lately.

I try to hold on, but I want a study guide for the exam called parenting. I imagine bubble wrapping my daughter for her first day.

“This is for the best,” says the principal, but there are no bell curves for our choices. Parenthood feels like a series of poorly worded multiple choice questions that you hope culminate in the passing score of an adult human being. And I take a step back, give my daughter’s shoulders a squeeze as we prepare for her second first day of first grade.

A tough decision;
first grade feels like forever,
repeat to reach dreams.

© khartless 2021, All Rights Reserved 


dVerse’s Haibun Monday heads ‘Back to School.’ Join us in sharing your memories.

NPR Study on holding kids back a grade.

29 Comments

    1. K.Hartless

      Yes, I understand. I’m grateful the children are both in school right now, but it seems all on the verge of unravelling again. Thanks for commenting. I still need to finish reading all of these school-day quadrille’s as I had an early night.

      Like

    1. K.Hartless

      Yes, how perceptive. Possibly they will remember the whirr of their fidget spinners or the sound of the smart board booting up or the sound of software loading. You’re right. Their experiences will be so different. Thank you very much for connecting.

      Like

    1. K.Hartless

      Thanks for this comment. Yes, I believe so. I trust my instincts more and more. It’s been hard letting go of logic and relying on something much more powerful, but there is no substitute for intuition.

      Like

  1. SelmaMartin

    Parenting is by far the best job in the world. You’re allowed to listen with your heart and relive your own childhood with your little ones.
    You might feel that you’re so busy now. Yes you are! But when you look at this time in hindsight you’ll recognize it as the best of best times ever. And you’ll cry because it’ll feel so short lived.
    Oh my. Please enjoy this. Promise!
    Don’t worry so much about keeping a tidy house. You’ll have PLENTY of time later to do that. Right now let the good times roll. Oh yes.
    Loved your post. Enormously. Heartfelt.
    Enjoy Parenthood. The best job in the world. ((You’ll understand this years later)) glad I read 💕

    Liked by 1 person

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