Treasured poetry and bargain prose await all who enter here.

Yard Sale of Thoughts

,

The Waiting Room Blues

Katie Frances Hartless
, ,

Cross caution tape to the receptionist.
Notice her polka-dotted plaster pig.
If you tip, is that anti-feminist?
Brown grass well-past harvest as her wig.

An hour in, you cling to pencil tip,
journaling is your partial partition.
A dingy in a sea of noise, you slip,
floundering in sneezy sea of sickness.

No, this poem is not your bodyguard.
Though it serves as gracious ghoonghat now.
Chances are you’re finally marred,
the doctor’s smile turns, a sickly plow.

The cancer’s found; it’s here to stay;
your brain’s on glowing, garish display.

This poem is written for d’Verse’s Thursday Night—- Middles & Turns. Peter is host tonight and invited us to write a haiku or sonnet with a dramatic turn. Join us.

Artwork: Hospital Waiting Room by Michael Salaman

39 responses to “The Waiting Room Blues”

  1. Björn Rudberg (brudberg) Avatar
    Björn Rudberg (brudberg)

    That last couplet really turned the poem around… love the detail with the polka-dot plaster pig.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. K.Hartless Avatar
      K.Hartless

      Thanks, Björn. I’ve seen those pigs in waiting rooms here. Never seen a tip go in, though.

      Like

      Reply
  2. johnlmalone Avatar
    johnlmalone

    a terrific opening; a catastrophic ending; what the %$$ is a ‘ghoonghat’ ??? was that word necessary?

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. K.Hartless Avatar
      K.Hartless

      Come, John. Everyone knows this is vibrant headscarf worn by women in India. It’s all about preserving the rhyme. This is a most delicate sonnet. 😉 thanks. I wrote a bit of it in a waiting room, but the turn was tonight’s creation. 😆

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. johnlmalone Avatar
        johnlmalone

        okay ; it’s a good rhyme though ; I’ll read it again 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      2. johnlmalone Avatar
        johnlmalone

        btw it’s a great painting; not a ghoonghat in sight though 😦

        Like

      3. K.Hartless Avatar
        K.Hartless

        Yes, but it is a “protective covering’ and she is looking for shielding from the waiting room and/or unknown news, which is why the poem also contemplates women’s roles in society-at-large. 😉 giggling….

        Like

      4. johnlmalone Avatar
        johnlmalone

        okay: there’s more to this one that meets the eye 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

    2. ben Alexander Avatar
      ben Alexander

      I looked that word up, and I think it fit the poem wonderfully!

      -David

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. K.Hartless Avatar
        K.Hartless

        Thanks, David. I worried it wouldn’t resonate, but I liked it too much to pass up on it.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Ken / rivrvlogr Avatar
    Ken / rivrvlogr

    “gracious ghoonghat” is such a subtle reminder of a turn that would seem to have been hiding in the wings, waiting for the “right” moment to spring itself on you.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. K.Hartless Avatar
      K.Hartless

      Thanks, Ken. I hope the silly to serious tone creates a strong turn. I appreciate you reading and commenting. Thanks.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  4. sanaarizvi Avatar
    sanaarizvi

    This is exquisitely, exquisitely drawn! I smiled hugely at; “Though it serves as gracious ghoonghat now.” 💝💝 (applauding) 🙂

    Like

    Reply
    1. K.Hartless Avatar
      K.Hartless

      Thank you for these kind comments. It was purposeful, but yes it also served the sonnet’s greater good.

      Like

      Reply
  5. Ron. Avatar
    Ron.

    Wowza. I was hoping it was just the flu or something, but, um, no….POW!
    Perfect turn.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. K.Hartless Avatar
      K.Hartless

      Thank you, Ron. I’m glad the ending had a good turn and punch for you. Cheers!

      Like

      Reply
  6. Helen Dehner Avatar
    Helen Dehner

    This is quite an ending! And unexpected, love the lead-in …. well done!!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  7. K.Hartless Avatar
    K.Hartless

    Thank you, kindly, Helen.

    Like

    Reply
  8. Lucy Avatar
    Lucy

    Wow, that ending was a gut punch!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. K.Hartless Avatar
      K.Hartless

      Thanks, Lucy.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  9. msjadeli Avatar
    msjadeli

    This part got to me:
    “Chances are you’re finally marred,
    the doctor’s smile turns, a sickly plow.”
    I hope this is a fictional poem.
    Palaces of health are some of the coldest places on earth.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. K.Hartless Avatar
      K.Hartless

      Thank you for your thoughtful comments. While the waiting room is real, the diagnosis is thankfully not.

      Liked by 2 people

      Reply
      1. msjadeli Avatar
        msjadeli

        You’re very welcome and I’m happy to hear it.

        Liked by 1 person

  10. D. Avery @shiftnshake Avatar
    D. Avery @shiftnshake

    Good, just read above, and am also glad to hear it is not true for you. That was a turn for the worse! But well done and fun getting to the somber end.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. K.Hartless Avatar
      K.Hartless

      Thanks, D. Yes, the turn assignment brought about the doctor’s plow and the worst possible news, but I think it serves for a dramatic change in tone and topic. Many thanks for commenting.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  11. peterfrankiswrites Avatar
    peterfrankiswrites

    Great turn in this – you had me rolling along – gentle smile at the pig, ‘floundering in a sea of sneezy sickness’ a great line – and then bam the turn – ‘the doctor’s smile turns a sickly plow…’ Powerful writing contained these delicate 14 lines.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. K.Hartless Avatar
      K.Hartless

      Thank you for your kind words, Peter. Has me grinning this morning.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  12. robtkistner Avatar
    robtkistner

    Oh my, that last couplet is a knife to the heart. Made me reach for my chest.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. K.Hartless Avatar
      K.Hartless

      So, a bit of a hairpin turn? Thank you for sharing this.

      Like

      Reply
  13. Hobbo Avatar
    Hobbo

    What a powerful ending!

    Like

    Reply
  14. ben Alexander Avatar
    ben Alexander

    The word ‘marred’ made me think of ‘marrow’, which alluded to the diagnosis, albeit (perhaps) unintentionally?

    Yours,
    David

    Like

    Reply
    1. K.Hartless Avatar
      K.Hartless

      I was thinking of scarred and that always reminds me of surgery. But, I like how you’ve taken it even more. Many thanks for your thoughtful comment. Happy Friday!

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. ben Alexander Avatar
        ben Alexander

        Shabbat shalom! ❤

        Liked by 1 person

  15. kim881 Avatar
    kim881

    I like the way you lead us into the waiting room and set the scene with the caution tape and the receptionist’s ‘polka-dotted plaster pig’, which made me smile, as did the comment about the tip. ‘An hour in’ reminded me of past waits as an out-patient and these lines evoked the atmosphere so well:
    ‘A dingy in a sea of noise, you slip,
    floundering in sneezy sea of sickness.’
    The turn is not unexpected, but it comes as a shock all the same.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  16. Ingrid Avatar
    Ingrid

    A wonderfully atmospheric sonnet, with a chilling turn at the end!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    1. K.Hartless Avatar
      K.Hartless

      Very kind. Thanks Ingrid.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  17. merrildsmith Avatar
    merrildsmith

    Oh my! That’s quite a turn. Beautifully done. I think waiting rooms these days are even more places of anxiety (to me anyway), but then to be given that news is such a punch.
    I really liked these lines:
    “No, this poem is not your bodyguard.
    Though it serves as gracious ghoonghat now.”

    Like

    Reply
    1. K.Hartless Avatar
      K.Hartless

      Thank you, Merril. I quiet like the bodyguard line as well. I really appreciate your kind comments.

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
      1. merrildsmith Avatar
        merrildsmith

        You’re very welcome.

        Like

Leave a comment

Author

Written by

Katie Frances Hartless

K.F. Hartless (she/her) is a free-spirited fiction writer and word trapeze artist. When she’s not juggling her career as a literacy specialist, she’s preparing her latest death-defying act on the keys.

Recent Posts

Categories

Trending